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Acupictrix - Dr Jessica Grimm
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EN | DE | NL

Historical Embroidery News...

On attending needlework shows

22/3/2016

27 Comments

 
This blog post will be a bit of a rant. Blog readers possibly don't like that. I deliberated for a long time. Should I write the truth or should I make up a candy story just to keep my readers happy? I decided to write my truth as my experiences are bothering me greatly. So, if you suspect you don't like my truth, that's ok. I suggest you scroll to the bottom of this post and read the happy part.
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Over the past few years, I've attended a couple of needlework shows in the Netherlands and Germany. People from the needlework community always urge me to have a stand at these shows. For various reasons. They think it is a great way to make money and reach new costumers. And for them it is a great way to see the supplies I sell before they buy them. Buying online has, after all, its disadvantages. Well, let me tell you what really happens at these shows.
They are a lot, and I mean A LOT of work. Preparing the kits for the workshops I offer usually takes up a whole working week. Then there is a day of preparing the stand and a day to sort everything back into the studio and to update the webshop. For the Allgäuer Nadelstiche, I counted 111 man hours. With the small profit we made, it means we worked for €2,46 per hour before taxes. Myth busted. I don't make a good profit at these shows. In fact, I usually make a loss.
But this is NOT about the money or the hard work. Although it is my dream to earn, one day, the legal minimum wage with my embroidery (which currently stands at €8,50 per hour in Germany), I know how to come by till that day has come. No, this post is about how the visiting people treat us at a typical needlework show. There is a major lack of respect, politeness and positive vibe. It is best compared with a 'live' facebook experience. People seem to think that it is ok to say just about anything nasty to us and behave badly. Below follows an account of the most popular harsh remarks and bad behavior.
"Just wait a couple of years and you won't be able to see your stitching. Just like me." What a horrible thing to say, don't you think. I feel genuinely sorry for her that she can't stitch anymore because of her eye problem. But wishing me the same is just disgusting. By the way, this has proven to be a very popular remark...

Another one from the top ten: "Did you make this? No way! Not you."

"Is this a sheltered workshop, your hobby, or (laugh) your business."

"You will never be able to make a living with this, anyway." This one is often followed by suggestions that I could lower my prices somewhat so that I would at least be able to sell some of my products. I find this a very schizophrenic remark. On the one hand, women in general complain that in most countries they don't get equal pay for the same work duties as a man. On the other hand, men like Kaffe Fassett, Arne & Carlos and the Myboshi boys can make a living. And that's because women buy their products and are prepared to pay the price. Then why are most women not prepared to pay the price when the product is made by a woman? Getting equal pay is, in this case, in our own hands!
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One woman walked up to my workshop ladies and said: "This is prison work and you are all mad that you are taking part. What! You even paid for it?" My workshop ladies were shocked.

"Where is your business based? Oh no, that's over an hour's drive. It is better you come to me." I always offer to do that and charge for my extra time and gasoline. Strangely, my opponent is never amused.
And then there was the thingy with the booked workshops. One of my workshops was fully booked and I had to turn further bookings made at my stand down. All 'before the show' bookings were taken by the organization and I had no influence on their marketing. The organization only put the workshop name, its price and my name on their website. However, I had a detailed description on my website with pictures. Prospective participants could have googled my name or asked the organization for more information. It turned out, they hadn't. And of course, it wasn't their fault, but mine. Upon arriving for the workshop, four of the six pre-booked ladies didn't want to attend the workshop. It was too expensive and not to their taste. Two simply walked away with no excuses or anything. They left it to their friend to apologize. Nice friendship by the way. Fellow standholders were aghast by such bad behavior.
Onlookers at workshops are most welcome. No problem at all. I enjoy teaching and passing on my knowledge. However, there are limits to what I would call 'acceptable behavior'. It isn't ok to snatch my teaching instructions from the table (or indeed my hands!) and to start to read them intently from cover to cover. Or to take a picture with your mobile phone. That's theft. Upon politely suggesting that they are more than happy to attend the workshop and pay the workshop fee, these people bluntly tell me that they 'only wanted to see how it's done as they are avid needleworkers and don't need a workshop'.
And then there are the many, many people coming up to our stand dour faced. They grab a product and lovelessly throw it back into the container. Why?! My heart blood is in there.
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Was it all bad? No. A hand full of people were genuinely happy that we were there. They thanked me for the wonderful workshop they just attended. They complemented me on the detailed pictures and the superb technical drawings in my instructions. I greatly enjoyed interacting with these lovely fellow humans. They helped me not to start crying. And maybe this is just all my own fault. I don't have a thick skin. Over the years, it just won't grow much. And I believe, that's not necessarily a bad thing. It means I can easily move and reach out to those who are less fortunate in whatever aspect than I am. It meant that I could patiently listen to the old lady who wanted to tell about her grandchildren but couldn't remember how many she had.

In the near future, me and my husband won't attend needlework shows anymore. They are just not for us. I hope, after reading the above, you'll understand.
As a result of the many unsold workshops at the Allgäuer Nadelstiche, I offer the kits at a discount. To make room on my studio shelves, I am also selling off other embroidery supplies. You can find these under Sale-Abverkauf in my webshop.
27 Comments
Karen
22/3/2016 15:48:14

Aww....this makes me sad. But I know it to be true in the US as well. It is hard work to have a stand. I have volunteered to work a friend's stand a couple of times. For free. Just for the love of it. And you are so right with the comments. It is sad that egos seem to have no feelings for another ego. 😢 So sorry.

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
22/3/2016 18:40:59

Thank you very much for your comment, Karen! It was a big relief to just write it down. Sleep over it, ammend it a bit and then publish. I suspect quite a few of us have made the same bad experience, but keep mainly silent on it. It is after all not what people want to hear in a world that's in such turmoil.

Reply
liz n.
22/3/2016 16:42:39

I have to say, none of this surprises me. I no longer attend needlework events of any kind, and I used to go to every quilt, embroidery, and knitting show I could find.

But you have people man-handling products, walking in and out of classes, rudely critiquing juried pieces, making ridiculous demands of vendors, and snapping pictures left and right in areas and of things which are clearly marked "NO PHOTOGRAPHS" or "DO NOT TOUCH."

I even witnessed a woman barge into a seminar she hadn't registered or paid for to loudly ask if she could "just get (the speaker's) autograph."

With all the time, expense, skill, and pride we put into our own work, I expect better from us when we attend these events.

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
22/3/2016 18:43:40

Thanks very much for your comment, Liz! Luckily, each time I attended, I did meet lovely people. And I know that these lovely people will find me and are prepared to travel for it. Take care.

Reply
Martina Rogers
22/3/2016 18:18:51

Me and my daughter thoroughly enjoyed the workshops we attended last year and we really love your kits that are well prepared and worth every penny. It's such a shame that most people don't appreciate all the hard work and preparation that goes not only into the shows but especially into the designing of a new kit and the instructions which in your case are really well explained and documented. One day we will hopefully be able to attend another workshop of yours 😀. Thanks again for a lovely time at the Nadel and Faden

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
22/3/2016 18:45:12

Dear Martina, thank youso very much for your lovely comments! I do remember the two of you and it was a pleasure to teach you. And I hope we will meet up again some day. Take care.

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Jennifer S.
27/3/2016 22:25:49

I agree with my mother =) I really enjoyed myself and am now, thanks to your wonderful instruction, working on a large piece for my grandmother's 75th birthday. Thank you so much, and don't listen to those who have no idea how much work and time goes into this beautiful hobby. Thank you for your time and hard work, and for a wonderful day at the Nadel und Faden!

Catherine link
22/3/2016 19:43:15

Thanks so much for sharing such an open and honest experience. I am no where close to your level of expertise and have only ever attended shows as a 'spectator'. I do however appreciate that many vendors will only make a loss from the show, and find it appalling that people would ever be anything but respectful and appreciate the hard work that has gone into each and every single item they are seeing. As a 'crafter' they really should know better, as it takes all of us time to do whatever we work on. I'm so glad there were some happy appreciative people there for you.

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
23/3/2016 15:05:09

Thank you so much Catherine! It really is heart warming to read all the messages of support. There are nice people out there :). By the way, I love following your elephant. So many stitches, threads and shapes. Thanks for sharing your needelwork journey with us!

Reply
Mabel
22/3/2016 20:03:38

Lieve Jessica,
Wat een droevig verhaal en erg dapper dat je dit zo openlijk schrijft op je site. Ik heb een soortgelijke speech hier op de Bee's gehouden. Over het schaamteloze gedrag om niet af te bellen, enz te veel om op te noemen. Ook ik vind beurzen erg leuk om te doen maar je doet het allang niet meer om een boterham mee te verdienen. "Veel voor weinig en nooit chagrijnig" Deze onvriendelijke mensen weten niet dat ze met jou Jessica als begaafde docente GOUD in handen hebben en waar ze heel veel van kunnen leren.
Heel jammer dat je zulke slechte ervaringen hebt echt heel jammer.
Veel liefs uit Dordrecht

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
23/3/2016 15:10:06

Lieve Mabel,
Dank je wel voor je hartverwarmende woorden. En dapper dat jij het de dames in het gezicht hebt gezegd. Bij mij blijven vaak de juiste woorden op het juiste moment uit. Ik ben vaak zo overdonderd door het merkwaardige gedrag, dat ik er niet op een voor mij handige manier mee om kan gaan. Maar het heeft enorm geholpen om het eens even van me af te schrijven. Het kost je een paar lieve lezertjes, maar dat is het me wel waard. En de lieve woorden uit binnen- en buitenland op het blog en via de mail doen me goed. Ook de herkenning bij anderen. Het blijkt een wijdverbreid probleem. Maar goed; op naar de cursus goudborduren die komende maandag start. En zelf ga ik ook maar weer eens een goedborduurprojekt opzetten. Dat heb ik wel verdiend!
Liefs en tot gauw, Jessica

Reply
Joke Schoonhoven
23/3/2016 07:51:04

Hallo Jessica, ik heb een paar keer een workshop bij jou gevolgd in Nederland en heb het altijd erg naar mijn zin gehad en veel geleerd. Jouw nieuwsbrief lees is altijd en klik dan door naar je blog. Jammer dat het op de beurzen zo tegenvalt, het kan een leuke manier zijn om collega's, klanten en nieuwe klanten te ontmoeten. Ik snap niet waarom mensen ronduit onbeschoft moeten zijn tegen zo'n aardig mens als jij bent, dat doet me echt verdriet. Ik hoop dat de zaken verder goed gaan en wens je veel succes met alles wat je onderneemt.
Vriendelijke groet, Joke

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
23/3/2016 15:12:05

Hallo Joke,
Dank je wel voor je lieve woorden. Ik ben overdonderd door de vele positieve reacties op mijn blog. Via de mail is er ook nog heel wat binnengekomen. Het blijkt een herkenbaar probleem waar meer 'makers' mee worstelen. Daarom was het goed om het er eens over te hebben. Maar volgende week weer gewoon lekker borduren, hoor!
Liefs, Jessica

Reply
Dima Santina link
23/3/2016 13:33:21

I don't know what to say except that I'm shocked at the behaviour of some. I hope this doesn't discourage you. I would love to go to needlework shows like this. Where I live we don't have any and I have to travel to get to one. To think that there are people who behave like that is unthinkable. I also agree with you about equal pay for men and women. Women tend to bring themselves down when it comes to work.

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
23/3/2016 15:15:42

Thank you very much for your support Dima! I've just added your lovely blog to my feedly feed. I love your idea for a name tag. Some day, I should make one too!

Reply
Lena link
23/3/2016 15:18:45

I'm sorry to hear that people are so stupid to you. I hope that your next event will have a better ratio of lovely people who appreciate your work.

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
23/3/2016 22:17:10

Thanks, Lena! I hope so too.

Reply
Sue
23/3/2016 20:57:20

Hello Jessica,

What a horrific experience for you. Some people can be so very rude and have no manners. What a terrible thing to say about your eyesight - that is disgusting. I am sorry that her eyesight has deteriorated, but that is no reason to say that you would be heading the same way. Also to say that it is "prison work" is unthinkable. We stitchers stitch because we enjoy it, not because it is drudgery. We are stitching "Works of Art", not just filling in time.

I understand and don't agree with how little one makes when putting kits together and getting ready for these shows. This sometimes is the cost if doing business and though it isn't fair, one never knows where it will lead and how many classes people will take or kits they will buy in the future.

Women should be able to make a living teaching Embroidery as Men do in the Fine Arts Business. There is no gender equality.

I hope these poor experiences haven't turned you off forever. Though living in Canada I haven't gone to the Shows you have been a participant in. I have been to many here in Canada and have been to one Knitting & Stitching Show in England, which I thoroughly enjoyed and have taken classes at. These shows are an opportunity to take classes from Teachers you might not otherwise have access to. Please don't despair. There are some wonderful stitchers who enjoy going to shows and don't abuse the merchants.

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
23/3/2016 22:18:45

Thank you for your kind words Sue! It has been heart warming to read all the supportive messages on this blog post and in my mail box.

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Wendy link
24/3/2016 09:20:45

How horrible! I love to attend shows as a customer, i take workshops whenever i can and i love to see the vendors stitching away. I have nothing but awe for designers like you and don't have any problem paying the prices you ask for kits - if i can afford it at the time of course. So much work goes into making a kit and you should be making a profit! Your work is beautiful, ignore the haters

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
24/3/2016 17:49:16

Thank you for your support, Wendy!

Reply
Henriet Simons
28/3/2016 06:55:37

Herkenbaar Jessica, klinkt hetzelfde als op de Handwerkbeurs in Nederland. Mensen willen wel alles bestuderen, maar een workshop volgen is ze te duur of dan roepen ze dat ze alles al weten. Heb ook ervaring met jouw goed gedocumenteerde kits en mooie ontwerpen, zeker waard aan te schaffen. Misschien is er in de toekomst een mogelijkheid tot het geven van on-line courses..... Ben benieuwd nasr je nieuwe goud project, ziet er veelbelovend uit!

Reply
Ellen
28/3/2016 17:27:19

Hallo Jessica,
Niets van aantrekken, die nare vrouwen. Jij bent een vakvrouw!! Ik heb erg veel van je geleerd...

Reply
Marina Berts link
4/4/2016 09:03:39

Dear Jessica,
Oh, how I do understand your text about Shows! I've been there myself quite a few times, and I've had the same experiences as you. I've also stopped participating in shows and I've given up teaching and workshops, as ladies complain all the time about the price of material and tuition (when they don't make nasty comments on my embroidery skills). According to them, I should be working for free, because being an embroiderer is no real profession. I'm now concentrating on my own artistic development, because I don't fancy living mywhole life having to justify my professional activities. For the last time, I will be participating in a European event presenting the work of artesans (JEMA), but you know, really, it's not worth it. So take care of yourself and stop doing things that make you miserable. Ladies visiting shows are not the right public for your top level skills, so do find other collaborations and projects that better correspond to your aspirations and qualifications. Love you, and I hope to come and see you sometime this summer!

Reply
Elizabeth Braun link
7/4/2016 12:48:05

Ach Jessica! Das ist wirklich schrecklich! I'm so embarrassed for these horrible people. And I thought needlework was such a gentle and ladylike art.

I remember talking to Mr Lansbury (father of Lizzie, one of the RSN grads who has gone into design, teaching and sales) and he said coming to the Show was really about networking and being seen. They really only broke even on the £1000 cost of the stand. They weren't there at all this last time.

I feel sad that I can't afford to do more than share positive comments with the stand holders. I find many kits over-priced for my budget (and my huge stash!!!), so I can't support financially, but I do at least try to be friendly and polite. I've never heard anyone being rude or unpleasant at any of the UK shows I've been to (but I expect it happens). I'm so sorry you've been so unkindly treated. It is tiresome being expected to work for a pittance or even for free, just because one tries to live on something creative and 'fun'. Perhaps some people see this sort of business as invalid as work is often seen as someone UNpleasant. Sad!

Reply
Janet Granger link
16/4/2016 13:24:29

Hi Jessica,
I'm so sorry to hear of your experiences at shows, but I can really sympathise with you. I have been running my doll's house needlepoint kit business for 20 years now, but me and my husband stopped exhibiting at shows in 2003, for all the reasons you mention - rude customers, too much really hard work for little profit, and the emotional upset of it all. We now sell very successfully only via the internet. People at the shows we attended would say things like, 'Bleh! Doll's house things! How horrible! Who would want to stitch those? It would ruin your eyesight!' while they were standing right in front of me. Although some of the shows made a profit, the cost of doing them was always huge, especially when you factor in the hotel and transport costs. I completely agree with you that it's just not worth it. And it is a pity that the few really nice customers who DID pay compliments, and bought things, eventually lose out, because all the 'small' designers stop doing shows eventually. I do hope you don't take it personally (although it does FEEL very personal when people at shows are rude). It's just how shows are. And when we each work that out for ourselves, we stop attending them. Good luck with your business though! There are other ways of reaching customers than through needlework shows.

Janet

Reply
Jessica Grimm link
16/4/2016 14:59:07

Thank you for your kind words, Janet!

Reply



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